Let The Games Begin

Are you ready for the most exciting competition to commence?  I am not referring to the Rio 2016 Olympic Games, that competition has nothing on what I am referring to.  Back to School which leads to a new round of Mom Wars.  What the hell are Mom Wars?  The act of pitting Mom vs Mom until only one stands in victory raising the Mom of the Year trophy, not to be confused with the Mother of the Year award which is often times awarded by a group of snarky Mothers to another who does not quite live up to their expectations.

What exactly is it about Back to School that makes women sharpen their claws and go for the jugular.  Did you know that Jennifer's mother brought in the store brand of cleaning wipes rather than the 540 count Organic celebrity brand wipes that required driving all over the province to find?  Obviously she does not care about the health of her child, her classmates or the effort the teacher put into making the supply list,.  How lazy can she be? Did you know Billy had a Star Wars party and not only did his Mom make him a Hans Solo costume she made all of the goodie bags look like R2D2?  Must be nice to have so much spare time on her hands.  I am not a Mother however I am an Aunt as well I did date someone in the past who had elementary school aged children who I spent 50% of the week with and close to 80% of their time at their Dad's house with.  I am also very lucky to have an array of friends who are a broad mix of different levels of involvement within their children's' classrooms and social calendars.

A few months ago, I was on Facebook when I saw a comment from a long time friend who had commented on crazy hair day at the vacation bible camp that her young son attended, I took her post to mean she felt like she hadn't done "enough" but let me tell you the picture of her Son sent the opposite message.  The smile was ear to ear and you could tell that he loved his crazy hair.  Thankfully many of her other friends also chimed in with encouraging words.  My comment was that she was feeling this way compared to some of the elaborate styles sported by the Pre-K crowd is the Pinterestification of Motherhood.  On the flip side I have a friend who has three children, 2 in elementary school and the last entering high school and she is not someone who will ask you to buy cookie dough from her rep soccer player or to buy a magazine subscription to cover band costs.  Via email she reaches out to coaches and teachers, finds out what the amount her child is to raise and writes a cheque and calls it a day.  This process came into play after her eldest child was in Junior Kindergarten and no matter what she did it was not the correct thing to the other parents.  She worked so she was unable to be a field trip Mom, she dared buy a fruit platter for Christmas party.  You get my drift.  On the flip side I have many friends that I sit back in utter amazement over who are able to whip together a theme birthday party that looks like it was thrown by a professional party planner.  They are able to do this for a number of reasons, they are organized and able to multi-task.  In addition their level of creativity is something I aim to match.  They also crowd source ideas, hey guys I am thinking of throwing a party for Melinda and her current obsession is becoming a baker, what do you guys think would be fun for a group of 10 year old kids at this kind of party?  I also have friends who are more than happy to throw a super generic birthday party where the kids are going to just hang out, play and eat some pizza, drink juice and have cake.  Is one of these mothers' better than the other?  Does one love their child any more than the other?  The truth is, they are all great mom's and love their children equally, they are doing what is the right thing for their child, themselves and tfamily.

Back to School night is something I am beyond thankful I do not have to partake in (I did go to school to be a teacher....) as this is another chance for the judging and claws (were they manicured at home or did you take time to go to the salon??) to come out in full force while dressed in the latest assortment of fall fashions available at your local mall or quickly recycled from years past.  "I am looking around and I am having a hard time determining the theme to your classroom, what is it?"  or on the flipside "Gee I wish I was a teacher who was able to have the Summers off to be able to whip up a classroom like this over labour day weekend"  This is often said with a sweeping gesture to a room featuring a Where the Wild Things Are theme which has been painstakingly put together over the last two months.  Similar to Mom of the Year cup, teacher wars are strong. 

When I was in the position where I was responsible for making lunches for the children of my ex.  I was tired of the food being brought home only to be thrown out because "we don't like it" and I was not allowed (full story for another time) to say "make your own lunch" so I turned to Pinterest (freaking Pinterest) and came up with a few different ideas.  One that stuck was kabobs, fruit as well as meat and cheese.  I turned those bad boys out like it was my job until one day.  I was dropping fast food (yes fast food) off when the Principal stopped me on the way out of the office.  He verified that I was indeed the stepmother of the two children I clarified that I was not their stepmom but their Dad's girlfriend.  He than proceeded to inquire if I was making the fancy lunches (really kielbasa and cheddar fancy??) and I confirmed it was indeed me.  I was literally left speechless thirty seconds later when he asked me to not do it any further.  What? Why? Apparently there were other parents who felt like I was trying to show off  because I had so much free time.  What in the actual hell?  I quickly explained that I was sorry that the track pant mafia felt put out but I indeed did not have so much free time I just managed to work my schedule with meal preparation.  Track pant mafia, isn't that me calling other parents names?  Yes it is and I am not proud of it but felt justified at the time.  There was a small gaggle of Mom's who all stood together (in their track pants) who made their presence known on the playground all while serving either approving or disapproving looks to other Mom's.  It took me awhile to figure out what dastardly sin I had committed and when I realized what they were I could only shake me head.  However back to my conversation with the Principal and the fancy lunches; the number of kids in that school who came to school without breakfast and had to have snack bin and again an "office lunch|" (note to my readers, we do not have cafeterias in the majority of our public elementary schools here) on a daily basis yet I was being chastised for sticking cantaloupe and grapes on a skewer.  Seriously???

If your child is fed, dressed appropriately for the elements (until they are in middle school and they will ignore everything you say) and behaves in a respectful and situationally appropriate behaviour I promise I won't judge you with my Pinterest rating.

In closing please remember that every Mother is doing what is right and best for them and theirs.  If you are about to jump to conclusions, ask yourself would you want to be judged in your current position? 

Welcome to Through my Eyes

Welcome! Thank you for taking time from your day to visit my little corner of the blogosphere where I will be sharing how I see life and the world through my eyes. When I was tossing around the idea of starting (yet another) blog the concept and point of it was my stumbling point.  The number of new blogs that start on a daily basis is mind boggling, heck I have started and abandoned more than I can even remember. I hope to share with you, my readers the way I see things. you might be wondering, if the things I see through my eyes and want to discuss will always be heavy and deep?  Being 100% honest, not a chance; I can assure you that content will be a blend of heavy stuff  that will make you think (hopefully) with what my opinion on the appropriate ways to drink pop Will my opinions always be aligned with is considered the norm or popular opinion?  Likely not and you know what that is okay. 

So, who am I and why do I think what I have to say matters?  I am just that lady, wait not a lady I am the girl, no not that either.  I am me and I know a varied group of people who in turn know those people and as I result have connections to some interesting life situations.  I also wear about 15 hats, girlfriend, daughter, sister, human mom to a spastic rescue cat who might be part prairie dog.  I am the bestest Aunt.  Ridiculously loyal friend and someone who actually enjoys their job.  Biggest downfall, I am accident prone, eagerly awaiting the arrival of my bubble suit.

As I finish up this post, I am listening to the news, all sorts of bad news.  Please be kind to each other.